Being Pushed Away

A person can count on how many times another person pushes him/her away; some may do something about it and for some, just take it and pretend like nothing's wrong.

As for me? Well, I found myself pretending like nothing's wrong and everything's fine.

For those times that I have the chance to walk away, but never really have the courage to do so. No one is to blame besides me. I brought this upon me, the sadness.

It's been days and here I am, contemplating about how I let all things got worse. Been missing classes 'coz apparently I am not feeling well.

I know myself, I'll be able to face the world again, in a few days time. I just probably need a little time, a little time for myself.

I cannot afford to be pushed away again, for the longest time. My life recently have been chapters of ups and downs (mainly downs) and there are some few people who keep on holding unto me, for me not to get lost again, while in the process of achieving my dreams...

I just really feel sad lately, but I'll be okay.

Soon enough.

-Kring

For Far Too Long

People see things differently and even if I badly wanted to exclude myself in the equation, I simply just can't. You know how we all sometimes get things wrong, but in the process everything seem right? Well yes, in reality it happens.

We would see ourselves strong, not until we face what we fear most; like acceptance and letting go. There are quite some few things that I always consider (just because I am most of the times still scared) before I push myself to move on.

First is, wasting time hovering unto something that my mind knows means nothing. Like hoping to take love in return; yes I know for a fact that it shouldn't be taken, less likely to asked for. Love is a decision, not an option because we would say: "I love (insert name here), because blah... blah... blah..."

Second, well obviously because we feel that we love that person and that we don't want to spend days without him/her. But the real question should be: "Does that person reciprocally feels the same way we do towards him/her?"

Yes, we can blame ourselves for falling for someone who can never love us back. Blame ourselves all we want, then succumb to the pain for being dum-dum. Overthink about the almost could have beens of the love we feel, then feel disappointed with ourselves even more.

It's been far too long that I should have walked away from what I know is an endless journey with no destination whatsoever; now here I am, blogging my written thoughts away... Trying to drown the sadness with words which I know I can only do for now.

Because the truth is, it is really hard to walk away and never look back.

-Kring